Zack Snyder has all your answers in 2023's Batman v Klink.

Our whole universe is in a dark, dense state.

Don't worry—we've got some big bacon news coming up at the top of the hour!

It's not that simple, Simon.

I don't even own a Beethoven!

Is this offer to generate such decent cash open to all of us or just Resident Smartass?

R.I.P. Rip Torn

That might be TooREAL.

Reality Show Not Real, More at 11!

Unfortunately, we already missed that.

Better make it 8 years just to be on the safe side.

Pepito=Pete Townshend

You should just start enthusiastically counting down the seconds out loud at 6 pm instead. "20,543! 20,542! 20,541!" I bet they'd be happy to watch your movie then.

Did Fisher Price ever make a "My First Speakeasy" set? Best of both worlds!

Hell, I was definitely sober the first time I saw Phantom Menace and came out thinking it was a good movie, though I do remember the first thing I said to my girlfriend in the parking lot afterwards was, "Good movie, but it desperately needed a Han Solo-type." So the first cracks were there even then.

Don't you mean the yuuugest toilet paper roll?

And look how well the Phantom Menace turned out!

Toilet paper the Trump Towers!

Mmm, now I want Arby's.

Don't be jealous but tomorrow I'm going to drive around this town and let the cops chase me around. The past is gone but something might be found to take its place.