Just in time for her new show on Netflix..

“These hoes ain’t loyal.”

As a raging alcoholic I can tell you smoking/eating/drinking weed with a high CBD content is going to be better than anything.

I felt Adele was covering herself/body up through the entire Hello video and going as far as covering her neck with her hands.

My biggest problem with the movie takes place in the Vietnamese restaurant. The customer asks for bread and ZB, the waiter, is all like “no we don’t have bread this is a Vietnamese restaurant...”

This movie has caused me an irrational fear of dishwasher hinges. True story.

It’s only OK if it’s Greek pizza.

Catering leftovers. We’re in the middle of some Jewish holiday, in the NYC area that means lots of catering gigs which in turn means tons of leftovers. I have 5 lbs of smoked salmon in my fridge, which may or may not have sat out and been touched. I don’t care, free food.

I just ovulated.

Is that a serrated butter knife in the photo? I’m not sure how I feel about that.

Magnificent.

C.A., is there a video? There has to be footage of this.

less than a week after we got eloped in Florida, my now husband told me he only did it because I coerced hi. it’s been three years, we are both very unhappy.

Onions will smell gnarly quickly, I recommend changing the water daily.

Wait, that was all in one night, right? Assuming so, stick to one or two different drinks a night: beer and shots, beer and cider... Figure out what you like to get drunk on: what taste good, what doesn’t make you act a foolio and get you hung over AF. Then explore that beverage for all it’s worth: (let’s say) hit…

I made bacon chocolate chip cookies today.

I like to be on some dumb shit.

Because girth obviously...

Gif please

Whole Foods is considered the Walmart of natural food stores...