This girl is every girl I went to high school with. Probably says she loves fall because “bonfires, hoodies, and football” or some other mundane horseshit. I wouldn’t be surprised if “Live Laugh Love” was on every wall of her fucking house.

Raboner

Some perspective on how historic this is:

Cross country produces some of the harrier situations in sports.

there’s a guy outside who says he needs to be in here

I’m up late googling good teen action and I get this shit?

I think she means Jesus, the Mexican landscaper from my neighborhood who is going to track these guys down and fuck em up.

I guess kickers are real football players after all.

You know, we could save a lot of strain on the criminal court system if we just let employers adjudicate all alleged criminal activity on the part of their employees.

This all sounds made up - Borussia Monchengladbach, Bhoys, Motherwell, Scotland, the Holocaust

“Hi! It looks like you’re trying to run an A-2 Gap Slant? Would you like help running an A-2 Gap Slant?”

Yeah, it’s a civil case so money is the only issue. I could just as easily call her a money grubbing slut as you called him a rapist. Goes both ways.

My wife took me to Texas de Brazil for my birthday one year and expected sex afterwards. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT, LADY.

“The last thing CU football needs is another gash.”

Well, let’s hope the children are OK and everyone else is dead.

Best: Chicago Worst: South Florida 

NYC/Tampa

Wait, you can tie in baseball?

The Florida you’re thinking of is primarily north of the I-4 corridor, with the area south of that mainly inflicted with bouts of crazy instead of outright insanity. It’s basically two states here.