Man, these guys really won’t defend anything.

Showing your identification “in a very threatening kind of way”is in the same distant cop excuse family as “I thought that 8-year-old’s juice box was a gun, so I fired first.”

Make a habit of it. Some of the comments are pure gold.

Also very familiar with your wife.

Can’t tell you how many text messages I exchanged with friends seriously worrying about the health of a person I have never met and will likely never meet.

Jesus, man. This is harrowing. Like everyone else in the comments, I’m glad things didn’t go differently.

Did you post this in 2017?

With Lori Loughlin involved in this, I think it’s safe to say that this scandal is going to be everywhere you look.

and I’m yapping, I’m yapping, I’m yapping,

Pooping on an escalator, truly a gift that keeps on giving

No milk, no lemon, no sugar.  

Over 550 Canadian wins?

I may be shamed for this, nut I still believe that RGIII would have been an elite QB if Washington didn’t make him play on 3 bad knees.

John Elway was asked to comment, but replied nay.

Counterpoint: He chases stats and doesn’t make his teammates better.

that explains why his arms are empty

It is entirely possible all of this is a blip, that the Jaguars offense will return to being merely mediocre, and that’ll be enough for another deep playoff run.

I thought he meant Adam & Eve the erotic clothing/dildo store which is an odd place to tell HS students to shop.