Does Mark Wahlberg take an hour-and-a-half shower?

Not even the first time this has happened:

Bears fan here.  Conte has gotten better!

We’re not the worst! We’re not the worst! We’re not the worst!

does this post actually make no sense to anyone else?

Good thing this guy isn’t in a position to influence young children! 

Bring back McCowen!

Pictured: McDermott reviewing tape of Peterman

I would say that Nathan Peterman is a cup of moldy yogurt but that would imply that he had some offensive potential.

No problem, just a sign that you have a healthy relationship with sports and value the entertainment factor more than the “loyalty” of it.

JUST ONCE I would like for Deadspin to produce some un-Baezed commentary

Country GOAT is probably Willie based on all the songs he wrote for others, his longevity, and his cultural impact.

Johnny Cash isn’t country, don’t try. 

Do you have a picture of baseball’s true cannon?

Oh god. Slobodan yourself out the door.

Damn. Way to go and ruin a perfectly average day.

Are these places real? Or is this like Hobbit fanfic?

As a gentleman who weighs 224 pounds and has only ever been “not really fat” AT BEST in his life, I say unto you: fuck off, sir. Fuck off good and hard.

Your ideas intrigue me, and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

...grandpa? But...you’re dead!