While nobody’s going to deify Illitch, can you imagine what Detroit would look like today without all of the investment Illitch and Olympia have poured in over the last 20 years?

Now that’s a Hot-N-Ready take!

That’s CUBER. Say it right!

Someone didn’t read the article.

If you feel the need to count squares of toilet paper, you have some unresolved mental issues. Oh, and BTW, Costco has the best value in toilet paper. Plus, it’s really soft on the bung.

If Harper ever signed an eight-figure deal

“26" is right up there with “standing” in the world of absurd wiping answers that makes me question if we’re part of the same species.

3-4 for first one or two wipes. Then 2 is adequate. Once I’m down to two, I’ll wipe, then fold in half and wipe again. That way I can afford the finer things in life with the dinero I save. Also, you have to change directions, right? Go down for every upswing.

Yeah. Like Father, like other people’s sons, I guess.

The judge denied his request to be sent to juvie.

Last year I won a regional Sport of Shit tournament with a massive 8 Courics. It was impressive.

I know this never having interacted with him.

As a fellow Cubs fan let me tell you I’m a huge Trevor Bauer guy. They don’t win the World Series without his 5.40 ERA and 1.68 WHIP against the Cubs, that’s for damn sure. I’ll be a fan of his for life.

oh look at the big shot who has a job where he’s allowed to take bathroom breaks. must be nice, lord fauntelroy

“i haven’t met a single Native American yet who thinks it’s racist”

I’m going to have to ask you to leave now, please. Don’t make a scene.

Here’s how Lacob recalls the conversation, which he describes as “the moment that hurt me the most this year”

Who of us hasn’t drafted Adam Morrison third overall?

I’d describe it more as a type of light jogging. Or as the Europeans call it, yogging.

Mascot dunk competitions have more defense.