BUT WHAT IF SHE'D SAID NO?!?!

I hated saying "my fiancé." Because then people ask you about your wedding plans. And wedding plans are stressful.

Ugh. I can almost never find Hannukah decorations anywhere all the time and I assume it's because we make up a tiny tiny percent of the population. I guess this is one instance where it's better to assume than ask, because you don't have to find out...this. Sure hope they have a Michael's.

Ah, I couldn't see that.

Well, there's also Amherst College...

Judgey title.

Next you'll be tellin me wrasslin's fake too :(

Between Kovy and Bryz, the name "Ilya" has taken a huge hit for me this year. Fuck both of them.

What does "Mom's spaghetti" mean?

I feel like it's hard to be in-the-moment when you're tweeting/interneting in general, and I would want to be in-the-moment. That being said, whatever gets you through things like this...

Also they are all white people. People who aren't white can't even get a magazine cover posthumously.

Yep that sure is a lotta white ladies.

I feel like Leviathan is all over it.

"Thoroughly Modern Miley." LOL.

This horrendous thing shut down my whole internet.

Also, the Kids Wish Network is clearly trying to sound like One Last Wish...

Poor Rachel. Poor Trayvon. Poor America.

I have never ever thought of either of those two words as gendered. Tipsy is a very cute word either way.

I always want G&O to be funnier than they are.

Paula Deen riding a dolphin is now my background photo. Thanks, Jez!