Lindy. I'm a judgmental writer and you are my favorite. These people are only reinforcing your point, so, well done!

I just feel like those hats are so stylish and everyone looks so great in them anyway, why mess with perfection?

Aw man. I hope you change your attitude towards yourself. Every artist started out as someone who tentatively, self-consciously called themselves an artist at some point.

Um those neck scarves they make flight attendants wear are NOT on-trend, and haven't been since smoking was permitted on flights and you could bring your own bottled water through security.

I would like a gif of Doug singing the Patty Mayonaise song please.

Um, Carrie Brownstein, I will do airobics with you, that sounds SO COOL. I hate exercise but I do love a good trampoline.

"L[e] petit prince Justin Bieber" — I wish I was good at photoshop so that I could make jokes about this ALL DAY. Where is the planet of abandoned monkeys when you need one?

This is especially stupid since she didn't work at a store...what impressionable (thin & pretty) teen is going to see her and be impressed?

I THOUGHT IT WAS KRISTEN WIIG DRESSED AS LUCILLE BLUTH

I think this is crucial here, as a defensive diet coke drinker: "None of the subjects had experienced consistent or adequate dental care throughout their lives."

Do Courtney Love and Amanda Bynes know each other IRL? Something that fascinates me about Twitter is how it's this weird public forum for celebrities to talk to one another on this weird "it's ok, I'm another famous person" level.

It's not that she doesn't check her computer, it's that she reads newspapers in hard copy. She seemingly checks the internet a lot.

Haters gon hate. I loved this.

Wait, this kid is a rabbi at 18??

This is the #1 thing that bothers me about Once Upon A Time. #2 is the special effects.

"People have not been this worked up about a paternity mystery since January Jones." — Anna Breslaw, that is a fucking funny joke.

Can we stick to mocking celebrities who totes have it coming and not the mentally ill? Thanks.

I think it's more extreme than the contouring that Kardashian does - this person is definitely using darker makeup than would be used if trying to blend in with the natural skin color, even with contouring. I don't know if it count as blackface, though.

I can't handle the ads in the middle of the articles, even if they're for related articles. I've never complained about Kinja before but aghhh.

These are the least surprising companies not to sign. These companies have all been shady for years...Gap especially. Walmart especially. Scratch that, all of them especially. Also if one more well-meaning Gap employee tells me "you're curvy!" when I walk in the store, I will punch them.