Working in stats and analytics makes this answer even better. 

(The kind who can take a group of scrubs from the end of the bench and beat what we assume is a team led by KAT and Wiggins.)

Want the ingredients? Buy a bottle of the sauce. The ingredients to the sauce are on the label. No FBI level investigator needed.

This one killed me:

At one point, he said that Cora’s addition of Devers and Holt into the lineup was “turning into the greatest lineup change in the history of the game”. I mean, only Alex Cora would think to play a few more left handed bats at Yankee stadium. Simply brilliant.  

He got pissed last night at Benintendi swinging at 3-0 in a 10 run game. Just when you think you’ve heard all the unwritten rules!

Darling was also wondering why they were still taking 3-0 cuts while up by double digits.  Uhm, to wear out their fucking pitching staff for the next PLAYOFF game you idiot.

Seth Jones is now on the radar as a regular Norris candidate.  He’s fantastic.  Hope his injury is nothing serious.

I agree with you - my description probably was over-the-top because it’s Tortorella behind the bench. He’s always coached teams in an aggressive/open-play style which typically ends up with team numbers that are below-average on the defensive end (because they end up taking risks and trading chances on defense).

Aroldis Chapman. 

The closer that beats up women?

I am somehow more confused about how this game works after watching the video than I was before.

“When they had no tipping, the staff… complained about not being rewarded during busy times.”

Meanwhile, inside the patrol car...

See also: calling anything you don’t like “hipster.”

“much orange. very alcohol. can haz moar campari plz. wow.”

It’s like he’s being waited on by Spicoli. Why he thinks that’s “millennial” is beyond me.

A’s are not a small market team. It just appears that way because the billionaire that owns them is a cheap piece of shit.

Joke’s on you. Doing it on camera makes no difference.

See what happens when you ban wedgies? All the kids who deserved wedgies go wedgie free and then go on to do things like this.