At least he didn't get too drunk and leave a dictaphone full of his stand up routine in yr handbag

I'm torn between outrage on your behalf, and wishing someone would give me $200. Best I've ever got was £2 and a protein bar. And I think the £2 fell out of his pocket.

Frankly i don't ever want to know what my face looks like when I come. There is a reason it is called la petite mort.

This is a very British post.

I had a terribly sympathetic cry fest with my old BFF over a weird guy like this. When it's obvious where all their making-out was going, they start for his bedroom. He pulls back the covers, motioning her to get in, and she did. Then, in front of the several full length mirrors he had in the bedroom, he does a strip…

"wouldn't leave till i'd made her breakfast and then proceeded to eat mine whilst I was making a tea (she found it hilarious)"

One night stand sex surveys? Really?

I do that when I drink coffe at work, but it is involuntary

Japanese: the most romantic language in the history of neckbeards.

Hey. Do you think someone with this kind of amazing taste in men would still be single?

this helps me not feel as terrible about:

I think you slept with a furry. My furry brother and his friends always go out wearing those clip on tails..

I bought me and several other people Chinese food, and used the leftover money to buy a pair of shoes I always wanted.

Ha! Well, those dudes were definitely a bit embarrassing in the grand scheme of things. My burrito game is always on point though.

I read that as "iron worker who was a secret librarian," and I was like, "dreamboat!"

This ballerina dude who was in charge of "gospel dance" at his new age-y church. When we were done, he rolled off, and put a handmade hemp bracelet on me with five different colored beads.

A guy whom after causing so much drama at a party, by drunkenly hitting on all my friends and kissing several who were already in relationships, left me something on the desk in the morning after we had sex.

Just for you, Jerry: the crazy Brazilian who snuck back into my room while I was sleeping (2 hours after I sent him home), the teacher fetishist, the guy with the tail, the guy who refused to talk to me in high school, annnnnnnd my second cousin. Just for starters and because you asked nicely :)

How to choose? Was it the guy who hogtied me with his socks (see my winning entry in the Awkward Sex Pissing Contest)? Was it the iron-worker who was a secret libertarian? Was it the drunk guy who demonstrated how he could come on command and then told me that he had no respect for how I earn a living? Was it either…

I have slept with so many embarrassing people. I made a lot of poor decisions in my late teens/early 20s. I lost my virginity to a 16 year old drug dealer when I was 18. And then I slept with him again a couple weeks later because I thought it might make me feel like it was a thing and not just a truly horrible idea.…