Miley, we get it. You are a BAD GIRL! You’re SO BAD.

Fellow Jezzies, I am about to murder three of my neighbors. They NEVER stop making noise. It is ALWAYS something—banda music, salsa music, fireworks, scream-singing into the middle of the night, their loud, bumping bass cars all hours of the day and night...I call the police, but I live in LA and on the weekends when…

BUT HE HAS TO MAKE THE POLISH. IT IS BEING DEMANDED OF HIM.

There was an actual script for that? After seeing it, I figured it was just a map of where the boat should go in the ocean.

a lot, not alot, asshole note giver.

I think I would have never spoken to my either of my parents again had I ever witnessed this.

I was snooping once, when I was maybe 8?, in my dad & stepmother’s room—this was in the midst of a very heated custody battle that my bio parents were having about my sibs and I and it had been “suggested” that I do this by my mother—and ran across an actual banana hammock. It was a banana, with a face, and some green…

And shit themselves! That has appeared in at least two of these comments! How drunk is that?

Or the overhead bin on a plane. Read about that one today too.

You really got those right!

That’s rad! Good for you for being able to do it and willing to talk about it! I don’t have children-and I’m not sure if I will or not-but putting everything back to where I start from is a priority that my husband already understands. I think it is very important to feel good about yourself and if having a mommy…

I signed up to have access because I’m investigating getting my tear troughs filled and wanted to see what other people’s real results were. It seems like an okay place for actual user driven content/reviews and I have put off this procedure due to very inconsistent results for a lot of the women that I have seen on…

She is also, technically, a millennial. I’m at the high end of that as well, and I am so tired of all the judgement regarding ages. It is like no one has a clear definition for what women in their 30’s are called, so, you know, lets just heap a bunch of shame on them because they dared stay alive after 29. The…

8th grade? 8TH GRADE???? Please tell me this was investigated or something. I also come from a small town and the PE teacher/student affair thing was absolutely real, as several of the coaches married girls immediately upon graduation, which is still all kinds of gross (and years later, when I was in school and was…

I got fired from being a bridesmaid too, although it wasn’t over money relating to the wedding—it was over rent that she owed me and refused to pay. I called her out on it and she said that she didn’t need me to be a part of her wedding anymore. We didn’t speak for years afterwards, then she saw me in a couple of…

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

Fuck that person. Seriously. I hope you aren’t friends. OR, I hope you are friends, but not really, because you are just waiting till you get married so you can do the same insane shit to her. Have a registry that only has really expensive things on it just for her!

HUSBANDS! Amirite?

Seriously, did EVERYONE ignore “one of the demons that lives in Milania”? Because peeps, A COUPLA DEMONS TOTALLY LIVE IN MILANIA. This is a very astute judgement.

I like them so little I didn’t even bother getting their names right. So there. Add Dolly.