Please sirs can I have some more?

I never knew I wanted to see Skip Bayless murdered on live television until now. Though, in a way, I think I always suspected I did.

During a practice lunch interview, a coach chided her for ordering cranberry juice, saying it could be interpreted as a sign of a urinary-tract infection, she recalls.

My plan is simple:

Nick Saban? Cranky.

Small world- I actually read both of these books as part of a theology program I took part in after I got my bachelor’s degree. As much as I find this guy’s politics distasteful, these books are actually incredibly compelling. I had never considered myself a spiritual man at all, but the program took place right after…

Mark Wahlberg in:

This is pretty much how I picture the Deadspin offices. At least the singlet part.

Getting drunk AT the sporting event? Who am I, Rockefeller?

the engine will only last 31,000 miles.

Exactly. If the service intervals on a Gulfstream don’t bother you, neither will this.

Funny you mention that. I actually took her out in the car after it was finished, went on a long drive out in the country, and asked her to marry me. The car is probably going to stick around for a while.

I like stuff, right up until I have to move. Then I hate every purchase decision I’ve ever made.

Red. Red is happy with this outcome.

Scoring is easy. After all the rocks are thrown, you see which side is closest to the center. That side gets a point for every rock that is closer to the center than any of their opponents rocks. For example, yellow can have one right in the center, red right next to it, and yellow…

It’s funny cuz the Jax metro (where Amelia Island is) has the area code 904.

How the hell do you name him Lipstick instead of Treesus Christ? Come on, stoner mountain brahs. This isn’t that hard.

I kinda want to make a flow chart where for every issue the only possible answers are Ignore or $50 plus 2 hours of labor

“Percussive maintenance”.

I had a real interesting means of getting people off my tail with my ‘84 Tbird. The cats were gone (empty) and there was a pinhole in the crosspipe... single exhaust on the 3.8 TBI V6.

Andy called me in one of his bi-polar manic stages to tell me the cops had just left his house in Rhode Island. They had come to ask him questions about his Corolla wagon that was found torched in a quarry someplace. Andy fully admitted to me he torched the Corolla for the insurance money, but due to being an amateur…