Here is my (probably cockamamie) theory:

I’ve heard nice things about Earth-69

It exists because in a truly infinite multiverse, everything that *can* exist, *must* exist at some point in time.

Give the guy some credit, he murdered that pre-game pep talk. Just stabbed the shit out of it. 

Didn’t Top Gear do something like that once, but with a different car?

You know what Andy Reid finds even more enticing than Tony Romo’s busted ribs?

So padre, I take it you’re new to football?

I can’t help but think that picking Jerry Jones was especially galling because it shows that it isn’t TO’s mouth that kept him out.

This auction will have nothing to do with that except the furtherance of it.

I need this, a totaled G-Class and a full set of tools stat.

Somebody in the village should have him and others move their cars, take a bunch of professional quality shots of the street from every angle. Then the village just confiscates everyone’s phones and cameras at the beginning of their visit, the tourists wander around actually enjoy the place, and when they leave they…

I don’t even get why a yellow car would “ruin” a photo, instead of add personality to it. But then what I don’t get even more, is where on the venn diagram you get someone who is such a twee fucker that this is a problem for them, but then also is the kind of yob (that’s the term over there right?) that smashes car…

New England Aquarium denizens are too busy being deep fried or served in a delicious creamy soup.

Shut up, Dad

I think the license plate are torque numbers. Here’s why:

You are completely incorrect. This is the best SC ad ever, and I don’t care if it dates me

That Caribbean Series PBP guy was fucking riveted by the catch. Jeebus. He makes Joe Buck sound like Artie Lang after he snorted Vicodin and drank whiskey.

I’m sorry I can’t hear you over all of the LOVE

Said Stef: "NO KITTY, THAT'S MY POTPORSCHE!!!"