Also, he allowed them to put a very white bikini on a body that he had to know was going to be covered in makeup and glitter and lord knows what else. What did he think was going to happen to it? Did he really expect to get it back perfectly white? If he didn’t want to give it to them for the advertising he’d get from…

Happy birthday! All the happy returns. The best present I have ever received was from my little brother, who, about fifteen years ago, gave me maybe the greatest book ever published. I wore the binding out in a year. (This was before cats took over the internet.)

Happy birthday! my best birthday gift was a miniature donkey. She was rescued from a cruelty case and my husband adopted her for me, and a few weeks later we adopted a boyfriend for her from the same sanctuary.

The glaring subtext of Harvey Weinstein singling out Lupita Nyong’o is I can’t have people thinking I find non white, less than 5'11" women attractive. Of course he’s also a fucking racist! He’s a well rounded, equal opportunity douche bag.

Years from now, we will watch these videos from Britney and the answers will all have been there.

Gross. Sean Penn looks like he smells like beef jerky and dirty laundry.

re: Raf and Petra, he basically called her a whore (about sleeping with men for business deals) and did it again during the fight at the end. That’s a fantastic way to quickly fuck up your relationship.

Blake, it’s time to get a stylist. I know you think you know what’s what, but I’m telling you, it’s time to hire a professional. I mean, we all have teeth but I’m not about to do my own dental work, ya dig?

“I’ve never eaten a shirt”. That’s quite the statement.

Lars von Trier has an extensive history of being a total dick. He reportedly took pleasure in humiliating Nicole Kidman and she was so upset with the final edit of the film, she walked out of the screening. This is what Paul Bettany said about him:

I hope that in her home country of Bjorklandia (I have no idea, just guessing here), that there is a legal process to nail this bastard’s dick to a wall. I’ve never been into her music (I’m the right age but my heart was fully occupied with Alanis Morrisette), but my impression of her is that she’s a joyous and…

Now, don’t be disgusting.

I don’t watch Suits but a few months ago I was talking to a co-worker about Scandal. And we were both saying how we don’t like it as much as we used to. Then I said but I still love her suits. And he thought I said I still love Suits and started talking about that show. It took me a minute to realize the confusion and…

The entire Ford period has been omitted from the collection, which I actually found hilarious. LET’S PRETEND THAT NEVER HAPPENED, SHALL WE?

Tom fucking Ford. Have you been to the Gucci museum in Florence? The entire Ford period has been omitted from the collection, which I actually found hilarious. LET’S PRETEND THAT NEVER HAPPENED, SHALL WE?

Great piece. What did he even mean, “nothing is at stake”? All fiction is fiction. The stakes are almost always high for the characters, and almost always zilch for the reader, except to the degree he/she becomes invested in the story. Gottlieb’s “criticism” of the romance novels he’s read is lazy writing, tinged with…

I said pitch, not pilot. Loren pitched the show as a family of cannibals who run a burger joint, and the executive at Fox said “Okay, but what if they weren’t cannibals?” and Bob’s Burgers was born.

I’ve said it before and will say it again: I will absolutely tune in if Megyn eats a salad dressed with pepper spray for sweeps.

OK, place your bets, people.