Why did the Girl Scouts apologise? They're not the ones spreading lies about people.

Yeah, this is why I carry a Swiss knife around in my purse. People think I'm crazy, but accidents like these happen all too frequently. I started carrying it after I saw a child's hoodie drawstring catch on the top part of a slide, choking him, and his mom almost couldn't reach him in time.

That's unfortunate. Also, I always thought thrush was a kind of bird.

My 'Free-Market-Rah-Rah-Rah' prof would have laughed in his face and told this guy that real life is more complicated than models. Professor Free Market told us this on the very first day of Econ101, where we were introduced to the supply and demand model.

with hair, makeup and actual faces

At first I thought you were talking about poop.

I want to make a Twitter account just to tweet I LOVE YOU BIDEN I LOVE YOU SO MUCH PLEASE SMILE AT ME

I'm 5' and my brother was 6' before he even turned 15. My parents and grandparents are also fairly tall (they both played basketball in college too), so for years I suspected I was adopted.

I don't know. My first memory of my very old-fashioned Asian grandmother was her telling me "Ladies take small bites and chew silently with their mouth closed." My second memory of her was her correcting my posture by pinching me.

Oh wow, you have seriously strong willpower! I couldn't brush if someone were there pooping, or peeing, or washing their hands.

Do you wear lipstick? I always carry a tube around and keep spares hidden at work/home/car. They help (until I open my mouth, or I absently lick them off because they taste like candy.)

You're not the only one with a weirdly dyed mouth. I eat a ton of berries; strawberries/raspberries are okay, but blueberry stains make me hold my hand over my mouth while I smile. A guy once remarked that I was a polite, old-fashioned lady for doing that, but I was actually trying to hide my shameful blue teeth.

I don't know what her audience talks to her about, but my mom likes to watch other people eat. She's borderline anorexic with a serious exercise obsession but she's completely entranced by other people eating all the amazing food she can cook, to the point of passive aggressive anger if they don't clean the plate.

Yeah, that sort of mom is really, really embarrassing, and too desperate for validation to understand that she's destroying the teen's social reputation.

ETA: Someone beat me to it with an actual GIF!! Argh, much internet rage!!

Some people manage to age with grace and dignity. Madonna just makes me sad.

I just can't take my eyes off Miley's tongue long enough to lol at them.

Why is Miley's tongue always so gunky? Is she sick?

Twilight did pretty well, so you never know.

I'd watch that, too.