“Oooh baby, take me to Ikea!”

I’m sure he’ll be carefully groomed for a future in politics if he chooses. Although this photo set won’t help him, if you want to show off your body you’ve got to make the poses look natural like JFK used to. Like you’re just you know hanging out on the beach, on a boat or riding a horse shirtless through a mist.

WOOF.

Is that...chino shorts? With leggings?

I am the nineties calling to say that I would like my look back. Seriously- that was my look. Damnit. I rocked those things, you know? Enjoy, kids!

YOU CAN PRY MY CHOKER OFF MY COLD DEAD BODY ERYKAH IT DOES GO WITH EVERYTHING.

He is slowly turning into a teen age goth and I am READY FOR IT.

Shit, do we all have to publicly start apologizing for what little assholes we were at 14? This is going to take a while...

It’s viscerally embarrassing to read. I suddenly feel ashamed of all the obviously, transparently performative emails I’ve written to smart boys in a desperate bid to get laid.

Elle Woods knows nothing.

My first thought when I saw this tweet was similar. I am POSITIVE I have had lots more sex than Taylor Swift, and a kid, and my vagina doesn't look like any meat sandwich. Maybe some sort of rare beautiful but deadly flower.

Your vagina looks delicious.

I had a LOT of fun in my twenties, then had two kids so I guess this represents my vag to crazy, possibly fictitious god sandwich lady.

I saw a tweet that said basically that Nintendo did in 24 hours what Michelle Obama was trying to do for 8 years, get kids to go outside and exercise.

But... at least it’s getting people out and walking; right?

This x 1 million. I am so susceptible to cover art. I try to be sensible, but I end up passing books by because of their pastel, saccharine covers.

This is insulting to her journalistic integrity and how much risk she took, but not surprising. I have noticed that a lot of books authored by women are marketed to fail. A few years ago, I decided to make an effort to read more female authors (and have read some amazing books as a result), but I can't get past the…

Girlfriend is trying so hard to be black but she never watched Basketball Wives!?

A cheating Baller? Next you’re gonna tell me Santa isn’t real!

i'm not sure she knows what a freestyle is