I haven’t seen that many “KKK” signs in Fenway since last week.

Inspiring insight, truly.

You get to the Elite level by figuring out a way to talk about the fact that you do CrossFit in your sleep.

Besides Rosalina’s basement?

They’ve been dead for 67 million years dummy

And your roof starts leaking

Russell Westbrook: “I don’t give a fuck about the line.”

Stop watching this clown show, it’s liberating.

Holy shit that was great. +1

Meyers is a waste of oxygen.

“What do you mean you clogged the toilet with a boa?”
“It means exactly what I said fat ass.”

with dolan? areyoufrigginkiddingme?

Maybe Tom just wanted to beat Peyton Manning at something else

Everyone who generalizes is, without exception, an asshole.

Does Anker make flashlights now? Are they on sale today?

“Special K”????!???!!?? I... just.... <dies>

People who shoot in portrait mode are like people who cruise in the left lane. Let’s send em all to North korea

I worked 2 hours yesterday and made $4.15 too, but enough about Uber

This is the Blazers’ season summed up in a clip. Thank god weed is legal here for the time being.

If you want to dance go be a dancer. If you want to pitch quit being an idiot and throw the ball.