I’ve gathered you’re quite popular around here, so I’m probably going to get my ass handed to me for even asking you this, BUT:

Well, I just think, as a straight white man, we should take my feelings of uncomfortableness into account before we do anything else around here at Jezebel. That’s all. Is that so much to ask?

I’m so sick of being called “greedy, entitled, looking for handouts” because I want what every other civilized country has.

Nope, I don’t believe it. Even when he was a new born Joe Clark was never the youngest in the room.

Horrible Histories has taught me that The Tudors were indeed the grubbiest motherfuckers of all.

False. I spend my office hours on jezebel.

Yeah, George, that’s what it’s about... I’m sure it has nothing to do with the success and reviews that have already left your three prequels in the dust. Tisk, tisk, tisk...

Greek yogurt tastes and smells like exceptionally sour vomit to me for some reason. I can’t even be in a room with an open container of Greek yogurt without feeling horribly ill. The fact that it has a byproduct that’s terrible for the environment makes me feel (slightly) justified in my dislike.

That’s fine and dandy that you just don’t like sugar, (though I don’t think she’s being quite so literal with the cake thing), but I feel obligated to say that what the bathroom scale says is no indication of whether or not a person has an eating disorder. (I’m not saying that you do, of course, but that in general…

My Feminist Jurisprudence prof in law school, a legit genius who has devoted her life to issues like these, has looked at tribal models of restorative justice, and how those can (or can’t) be implemented in areas of domestic violence and sexual assault. You’ve precisely pinpointed the most difficult issues, Anna.

My love for Radiohead is not allowing me to think this is amusing, even if it’s a joke.

I suppose it depends on how quickly you feel the need to vacate the confined space you've scented with flatulence.

Maybe if it’s powering your vehicle...

Makes perfect sense, you become a dilated balloon, so plan is to overeat at dinner and fart all the way home loosing the weight , question is will it make me drive faster?

Beth, you coulda fooled me with the tone of this.

I'm a "troll?"

MARK WILLIAM DAVID SHRAYBER. That headline and that picture. You need to take a seat over there and think about what you've done.