Has anyone seen her birth certificate? We can still run with this theory...

Karmic! :)

I don’t mind registries, takes the guess-work out of gift giving. You can always buy something not on the registry, or just skip the shower.

Uniforms also suck because it means kids need an extra set of clothes - uniforms and then weekend or after school clothes. There’s not really an easy solution.

I bought Sarah Jessica Parker’s “stash” perfume because I heard good things about it and loved the smell. Some people probably buy celeb perfumes cuz they like the celeb, some because they like the smell. I doubt it’s any more complicated than that.

This image has me cracking up!

I can’t imagine what it’s like to have to have security around 24/7 to make sure no one crazy is coming for you. At least she has the means to stay safe (hopefully). Being stalked is some awful shit that can make you feel crazy.

Holy shit, I’m so sorry for your friend. Terrifying.

Impressive

Accurate 😝

This makes a lot more sense, I’m laughing at myself now. Thanks for clarifying :)

Wait is the conspiracy that Barbara is alive and wants to live with the Obama’s and is quite fond of swimming? I think I’m missing a couple pieces...

I sucked my thumb in my sleep through like, third grade. My parents tried everything to get me to stop - putting me to bed with potholders on my hands, taping my thumbs with gauze and medical tape, bitter nail polish. Nothing worked. Then I needed braces by 5th grade! Ha. I get why parents want to avoid all that, but…

The title makes me think of gravel, roadkill and potholes and I’d never want to be compared to a back road. Ew

I do see some grown looking people, maybe one is a body guard (aka underemployed 20 year old cousin) to the 9 year old?

Counterpoint: Trump had already proven himself to be a hateful idiot by this point in time.

Oh shit I’ve been wearing it wrong!

I’d like to work your username into this comment but I don’t know how. But yes, creepy af

Gotta spend money to make money! Or something.

I just bought one to wear while running and/or walking my dogs, and I’m so embarrassed by it. Mostly because I look like I’m trying to be athletic and I’m pathetically out of shape :’(