Vin Scully could read me to sleep with Sophie’s Choice and I’d still have sweet dreams.

So, he starts out by saying what a great guy Yogi Berra was, and how it wasn’t unusual at all for Yogi to discreetly pay the dealer for everybody’s cocaine and never take credit for it.

Fine, but can Scully tell us why Manny Ramirez isn’t wearing pants?

What’s with you nutty winter-lovers who always say, “I just love wearing jackets and bundling up!”

This graph is excellent, and perfectly captures my feelings towards the seasons, especially the ominous “anticipation.”

When you think of “going all night,” do you imagine one, continuous session that literally lasts for hours? Do people really do that?!? For me, “going all night” means having sex once or twice before going to sleep, maybe once in the middle of the night and again the next morning.

The tops of seats recline four inches. It’s really not that hard to recline partially. No tape measure involved, although given your weird level of anger, I bet you’ve got some experience using a ruler to measure 4”.

That’s great imagery! And it’s perfect.

If anybody claimed that a reclining seat would “crush their knees” and “make the flight agony” and “will leave them bruised for days,” I’d roll my eyes so fucking hard because that’s the most histrionic shit I would have ever heard.

I feel like whenever a blog needs to generate action, it can just run an article about tipping servers or reclining airplane seats.

I’m not obsessed with the meet-cute, but meat, cute? Yeah.

The commentariat has to either condemn a woman or give a free pass to a Nazi.

I for one am going to be boycotting Buddhism and encourage all of us to write emails to HR@lamacorp.org and see if we can’t get this man fired.

“I’m your height, and I never wear any tie shorter than 61” vs. the standard 56” or so that the little guys wear.”

I was a sick, twisted kid.

His joke didn’t insult any person or any group, so I don’t see the problem.

Whenever Jason Alexander would appear shirtless, I would always wonder, “does he shave his nipples???”

Yeah, what’s the cultural origin of the quicksand fear for your generation?

Dude, I don’t think anything’s happening. Should I do another one? I’m going to do another one.

I can’t disagree, but I’ll throw Family Ties into the mix. And, even though only 20% of its episodes ran in the 80’s, Roseanne was just as funny while probably being a little more ground-breaking.