words good saying, not at

He should have a grilled cheese to dip into that tomato soup, but don’t you dare use mayo...this is Drew’s son we’re talking about

The Rangers are little more than an excuse for ownership to build a new stadium every 10-20 years

That’s okay I forgot he won the Triple Crown; I thought the last winner was Armenian Phoraroh or something

Harper has hit 31 homers so far this season. That was once an impressive accomplishment. Now it’s a middling amount of homers for a power hitter in this league.

FUCK DALLAS

Man, Katt Williams would be a superb president.

Kid had the nerve to ask for my autograph after sidling up in a John, Maddened jersey.

I guess it’s nice for privacy, though I doubt there’s enough space back there for a comfortable lay

Before the game he must’ve ingested some Indipa (“in the parking [lot]”)

CHRISTian YelOUCH

I’m kind of astounded this kid didn’t know that wearing an Giants jersey is probably not the best way to get an autograph from a Cowboys player.

Or Rigoberta Menchú.

ILLUSIONIST’S

So many memories

Corona, like Heineken, isn’t really cheap beer.

Being a Baltimore native my go-to cheap beer is National Bohemian, which I consider superior to PBR—though it’s possible the two beers flow out of the same tank like the three varieties of Duff. Branding!

I know he kept playing, but Deshaun was hurt on that endzone dive, and he’s definitely still hurt in a way he and the team won’t mention but which should probably be a concern going forward, right?

Yeah, who’da thunk the first MNF game of the year would be GOOD?!

Hey, one question per commenter!

Okay, who’s next...Jorge Ramos, go ahead!