I was once Chuck Johnson. Then I went to college and pooped on a floor. It's poop.

Pooping is really icky also - no more poop!

no credit to Robertson Davies who, as far as I know, coined the term millihelen in Rebel Angels in 1981?

that's connecticut

"Mammary Lapse" would be a great "Pussy Riot" tribute band.

Assuming he is taller than his wife, why didn't he switch seats with her?

This isn't anything new. After Super Bowl XXV, Scott Norwood kept shaking his head and muttering "God hates FGs".

I had a civil conversation with Holly Fisher's husband.

Wowwwwww he pulled that "she needs to ask for forgiveness" bullshit on her husband?!

#TeamNoOne is growing by leaps and bounds these days.

Much more "this is about you having fun on your special day" and less "this is about me participating in a huge, rigged, imaginary game of Beat The Other Parents At Parenting."

It's actually based on this report from a Forbes "contributor," which is incredibly bad and dumb. I'm fairly certain anybody can post anything directly to Forbes.com these days; it's like Kinja that people actually use.

"Here's the thing, though: only one number factors into Super Bowl attendance statistics, and that number is STADIUM CAPACITY."

Imma go out on a limb and say it's nobody's business but his.

Some NFL team that was desperate for a quarterback would have surly drafted him in the third round.