OH MY GOD I ALMOST SPIT OUT MY BRUSSELS SPROUTS YOU'RE RIGHT

I used to love it but then I got it in my butthole once and I thought I was going to die. It felt like a thousand suns burning into my sphincter :/ haven't used it since

I love that stuff! I probably take a shower that's too hot, but I don't have any chronic skin problems other than face acne, which is impervious to seriously all forms of *doing or not doing anything. I only shower about three times a week (more if I get super sweaty). My fave, which I do about once a week, is to…

Ahhh, I remember... bad rico! :) Thx to you, I now retroactively deem myself a Six Feet Under reference.

Did you get your $10,000 bounty up front, or is Jezebel sending the check in the mail?

Sorry, Jez. I'm on Hannah/Lena's side.

Omg dave gilmour was dreeeamy.

He was mean as hell and sexy as fuck. I was like "why are we watching these tepid dipshits and their stupid teenage triangle when we could be watching Spader's character ascend to his prep school throne? Oh hang on..." and watched Less Than Zero instead.

November Raiiiiiiiiiiiiin. I watched that video over and over and over and over again.

I kind of love it. But then, it makes me think of two other things that I loved, way back when. The '06-ish Marchesa rose dresses, which I coveted within an inch of my life, and this:

Bender agrees

Steff is the reason we have the term hate fuck.

I am going to miss Danny Huston :-(

It's true. They can always be counted upon to comment on random pictures. "HI HOW ARE YOU SO LOVELY TO SEE YOU HAPPY IN LIFE NOT A BABY IN DIAPERS ANYMORE SAY HI TO YOUR FOLKS FROM ME AND LARRY. WEATHER SURE IS NICER ON MY ARTHRITIS HERE IN TUSCON.

I was ready with this picture for her new movie, "Unacceptable."

Steve Coogan feels you, bro.

I'm fine with criticism. I'd like to become better, and listening to criticism is a good place to start. But Groupthink posts speculating on my mental health posted in a space that the participants never thought I'd read isn't "criticism," it's performative outrage and gleeful, shitty small person bullshit. I wouldn't…

I can't believe you guys fall for James Deen's sociopathic manipulation. He pushes every lady button there is.

That's beautiful!