Because Johnny Depp is a piece of shit.

He’s spent his whole life making fun of and parodying everything. It’s only fitting that he did the same thing to himself for a biopic. A straightforward episode of ‘Behind The Music’ about Weird Al Yankovic would’ve been fucking ridiculous.

I took the bandages on his head and arms and the wrap around his foot as evidence that he had gone to the hospital at some point.

I’ve seen this painting in person at the MOMA, and it’s absolutely stunning. Thanks for the history lesson and explanation of the reference!

What a gift Serkis is to the show. Did we have any idea he was involved? I can’t remember. I was genuinely surprised when he showed up.

I got stuck in the Taft bathtub. Hell of a night.

Yeah, not sure why they went with an odd reference to The Shining in this particular movie. I remember seeing it at a test screening a few months before it opened, and while it was weird enough seeing it without all the special effects and score finished, that particular aspect of it stood out even then.

Film and television are visual mediums.

“CSI: Oxnard” looks promising.

It’s almost as if raising entire generations of people with kid gloves and teaching them from day one of their existence that every last bit of what they say, do, and feel was immaculate poetry delivered from on high was a bad idea.

Thanks for chiming in, Jeff.

You can watch the actual incident right here and see for yourself how much of a giant fucking nothingburger with nothingfries this whole thing really is, you cheap fuck. God forbid you actually pay for something.

I’ve seen it so many times that I could recite the whole goddamn thing by heart, and I can still enjoy it now purely for nostalgia reasons. It’s less of a movie for me now than it is Christmas wallpaper to have on in the background while opening gifts and eating my mom’s terrible Christmas Day breakfast. TV stations…

CHRRRRRIIIIISTUUUUUPHUUUUHHHH

Awwww, maybe one day they can launder each other’s money. Adorable.

“Yeah, no we’re not.” - actual white people

I wasn’t sure if I was watching Atlanta or a particularly great episode of ‘Documentary Now!’

It’s okay. I’m sure there are lots of things you don’t understand.

There is no try. Only (Brawn)do.

You flatter me so.