My uncle is a republican nutbag but he's registered as a democrat because he can subversively counteract votes? I usually tune the explanation out, but it's a thing some über conservatives do.

I’ve seen someone with a fake baby (my BF from childhood crazy aunt). She treated it like a living baby in ALL situations EXCEPT leaving it in the car. I feel like this is some weird attention seeking ploy. I mean, the lady I knew made family members acknowledge she brought the baby, often referred to it in…

I can't wink. It's the bane of my existence.

My mouth doesn’t realize I’m only 5’1 and 100lbs. I need to immediately assess all opponents and how best to dominate them.

If you’re ever challenged to a knife fight IMMEDIATELY remove all jewelry (except rings), remove your shoes (keep heels nearby for additional weapon if disarmed), wrap any belts around the wrist and forearm of your dominant hand and BEFORE the fight can officially begin use the knife to cut off the grab-able portion…

I don’t think so. This was the early 2000’s and I doubt his parents would have though to upload it...I'm not sure though? I didn't realize just how long ago it was until that question. It still seems kind of recent, like only a few years ago.

I went to a funeral of a friend who had died in a terrible car accident. He did NOT look at all like himself and I have no idea why the family chose an open casket but they did. The deceased was a talented musician and had recorded several pieces for a project he was working on. The recordings played throughout the…

I usually have to tack on ‘I am not joking’ or ‘this is not hyperbole’. People who went to regular school don't believe the shit we learned actually happens.

This is the exact reason I refuse to sleep in the nude. My husband has begged for more nude sleeping but I am POSITIVE an earthquake will happen the moment I fall asleep naked and all of my neighbors will see.

I think my husband would be very capable of maintaining pretty much the same style of life as he has with me...I don’t think things would be as tidy or organized because that’s something that has always been more important to me than him but I certainly don’t think he’d be living in filth.

Because you're a fool. Think of all that sweet mime money you could be making...

I can’t say for certain but I have absolutely no memory of evolution even being mentioned as anything other than ‘a secular theory’. My school didn’t even attempt a ‘divine evolution’ theory. We were told two theories on fossils and carbon dating...

I hope it’s free or that she is going into a field that doesn’t require an accredited degree...I had a lot to make up for. I was lucky that my parents never censored what I read or thought so catching up wasn’t hard as much as time consuming and embarrassing.

If lipstick is too heavy or pigmented for you try a colored stick lip gloss or Tarte(?) blush sticks. It’s an ample amount of flush but completely sheer. It’s kind of a just jogged or just kissed look. I’m super pale/ghostlike though so I can’t wear full on lipstick as blush without looking like I’m on Toddlers and…

Yes, I kind of look like a slutty Snow White only with JGF hair. Its my thing.

I never really ‘got’ the point of brown liner unless using a brown/black mascara.

My family was pretty liberal and both parents had college educations. I think it was mostly a case of being in a bad area (school wise) and my parents being either very ‘free range’ or assuming we were just really good at schoolwork. We rarely needed help and the few times we mentioned something seeming ‘off’ my…

I broke a molar eating a triscuit. Granted, I am a notoriously hardcore sleep teeth grinder but still, the wrong angle can cause a shit ton of dental damage.

I think the Bellagio(sp?) in Vegas had a traveling art exhibit- and when I was 11 years old I stood very close to the rope (face and shoulders hanging over but hands clearly behind the rope) looking at a Jackson Pollack painting. A burly sports coated security guard ran up and as much more politely than I would have…

I’ve posted previously about my horrendous experience growing up in a fundamental Christian area. We were non fundamental in a town that have very little educational options for those who didn’t toe the church line. There wasn’t even an actual public school available in my area to attend.