That’s fine and dandy that you just don’t like sugar, (though I don’t think she’s being quite so literal with the cake thing), but I feel obligated to say that what the bathroom scale says is no indication of whether or not a person has an eating disorder. (I’m not saying that you do, of course, but that in general…

Today I learned that Martin Sheen is Charlie Sheen’s father and also that Martin Sheen is not Michael Douglas.

Every single self-righteous scumbag that gets up on tv and talks about the ‘horrors’ of PP is responsible for encouraging this behavior.

So i’m perfectly ok with putting the blame for the deaths of these three people on the head of Carly Fiorina. Yes, she didn’t shoot them and yes, she didn’t make the videos. But she used them as a political tool to boost her numbers, knowing they had been manipulatively edited to push a far right political agenda. And…

Good for her. Only $64,850 more than I get for child support.

Considering Spain’s history of brutalizing the people of South America around the time that this ship sank, maybe Madrid can let this one go?

This is just my opinion, but others can feel free to jump in:

She is nothing like Donald Trump.

In one particularly memorable dream, Julianne Moore and I were married. After an apocalypse, we found an abandoned four-lane highway that snaked through some bland hills and cornfields (this was very much like The Road; I think there might have been the threat of organized groups of cannibals or killers, too). At one…

I have a very explicit (and unprovoked) dream that Ja Rule gave me a rim job.

The first sex dream I ever had was when I was about 8 years old. I dreamt I was french-kissing the Hardy Boys’ fat friend, Chet, on top of a quonset hut. I remember thinking it was fun making out with a tubby boy, because he was all plushy and comfy, and it was kinda cold on top of the quonset hut.

The second one is…

Had a dream I had amazing, hot nasty porno sex with Roseanne. Not flannel shirt Roseanne, older gray-haired bespectacled Roseanne from the roast. She was a strong fat under her clothes, had a silky gray bush, and laughed when she came.

My sex dreams are never pleasant. The worst was Woody Allen - he was doing that fourth wall/talking to the audience thing he does in Annie Hall throughout, and there was an insane amount of lube. He just kept slopping it on while he talked.

Once I dreamed that I was driving around in a minivan with Trent Reznor and our baby was in the back in a car seat. I was driving and I stopped the van so I could do sex to Trent and I took his pants off to go down on him and he had a big skull and crossbones tattooed on his penis. haha. More stuff happened but I…

Many people will remember back sometime around 2007 (not sure exactly) there was this hilarious song called The Ding Dong Song, with an equally spectacular video. Anyway, I was a fan and watched it with my friends a lot for the lolz, but I was always of the opinion that the artist “Gunther” was, well, disgusting. So…

I dreamed I was having sex with my fathers foot while he looked on in disapproval.

When I was still on Livejournal a lot, and obsessed with Star Trek fan fiction (hello ontd_st and pinto communities!), I had a large crush on Spock/Zachary Quinto.

I dreamed that my father hired me and another woman to have sex with him. He knew it was me and he didn’t care in the slightest.

You need to stop communicating with this man. He's cheating on his wife and you're not moving on with your life.

I would. Total waste of time, energy, and heartbreak. Although I guess I learned some things.