His wife even refuses to touch him

Wait until September when you read his “What I Did On My Summer Vacation” essay.

JFC, is there anything that comes out of this guy’s mouth that doesn’t sound like the utterance of a fourth-grader?

“Getting ready for my big foreign trip.” Seriously, “big”? Come on, “foreign”? JFC, is there anything that comes out of this guy’s mouth that doesn’t sound like the utterance of a fourth-grader?

Good to hear! I just take it off to shower and sleep. I get nervous i’m going to fuck it up, but so far so good.

Every jeweler told me I shouldn’t do it. They kept warning me that it is a soft stone. They they would suggest a sapphire instead. I didn’t care, I want what I want. I found my ring at an antique jewelry store in Oxford, England, when were were there for vacation. I love it! It’s not huge or anything, because that’s…

Deal!

I think it’s the dress. It’s full, It’s white...I kinda hate it but she can do no wrong.

Elton John.

I want all the emeralds. My engagement ring is emerald with diamonds, and I want emerald earrings for my wedding.

Sexual. Sexy. Sex!

Testino, who clearly understands Jenner better than I do, suggested that her photo shoots may be less “sexual” because others regard her as a high-fashion model.

Can we collectively make a deal right now that this is peak Kendall Jenner? We all need to agree or it won’t work.

A girl who was seemingly conceived, incubated, hatched, trained, conditioned and indoctrinated to be an object of sexual desire as the sole purpose of her existence and her only contribution to society is saying that she doesn’t get to be objectified enough? Do I have the right read on this one?

My husband loves the Duluth Trading Buck Naked boxer briefs. I bought him a pair (and their socks for steel-toes shoes) as a stocking stuffer one year and he promptly ordered a full week’s worth.

My husband loves the Duluth Trading Buck Naked boxer briefs. I bought him a pair (and their socks for steel-toes…

OMG. My dad used to say that when he’d catch me cry-reading Charlotte’s Web for the hundredth time. “Did you think the ending was going to change?!”

No. They’re bra straps. I just can’t even...

that shit is a straight up negligee for a toddler, which is 1000% worse.

There’s something very creepy about making lingerie-esque silk slip dresses for toddlers.