How to start your day like Mocena:

Shaka, when the walls fell.

“Optics.”

So this is the year of the prosthetic penis. I’ve seen like 4 movies where they show one,, but we all wanna see the real dick. Whose got the real dick? (we need equality on screen!)

I read it as:

I kept scrolling and it wouldn’t stop. Thought maybe I was dead and in purgatory.

I can’t. look. away.

Does Tony Goldwyn have an alibi?

Personally I hope this passes. And then I hope a Hindu or Muslem CEO of a large corporation uses this law to publicly fire all their Christian employees so I can watch all the Republican’s heads explode.

Perhaps the Satanic Temple will use this as an opportunity for some more wonderful trolling. The more the Republicans double down on ridiculous things like this, the more inclined I am to become a card-carrying Satanist.

Republicans are pushing

All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive…

I see NARAL. I think NARWHAL.

I was at a wedding with one of these. As soon as it started, I went straight for the bar. I don’t give a fuck if it was playing while everyone was being introduced. Fuck this trend. (and I do occasionally photograph weddings - I don’t visit the bar when I’m working unless that’s where everyone is)

Guys. I’m going to my 4th wedding this wedding season in two weeks and I really wanted to tell you all about it.

are we done pretending American Hustle was good, at least