Burlap and gingham aren't vintage. They're rustic. Those words do not mean what Pintrest thinks they mean. Vintage is time, rustic is material.

Argh, I hate the way people treat fish as disposable. Bettas need at least 2-3 gallons and a filter, if you don’t have live plants. Goldfish can live for 5+ years if you take care of them right (they produce a lot of ammonia and need a good filter and plenty of space).

Homer: What a dump! Why would Princess Grace wanna live in a place like this?
Lisa: Dad, that’s Monaco.
Homer: D’Oh!

Raincest.

Still trying to figure out why you hate joy

Oh No! NASCAR’s done gone gay too!

Someone did even better:

Wait until he finds out who owns ABC.

That’s grayist fuck you and your approved commenter privilege.

yea, but, Kurt Russell was in Big Trouble in Little China.

Soooo if the bakery gave her the flowers to put on the cake before the event, how would her guests even know, unless she was making a big ol’ scene about it?

Pretty horrified that any adult woman raising a baby girl thinks vaginas make something “dirty.” Did she try to get her money back from her husband too?

They are literally destroying my neighborhood to build a Whole Foods here, and the developers and Whole Foods quite obviously paid off the city council to allow the project to be pushed through, with the city selling land valued at six million dollars for two million instead of leasing the property per the norm.

Like I said, burn it down.

I don’t know how the phenomenon works but I imagine it’s related to whatever it is that makes so many poor people vote republican.

Uh-oh. I think my toilet paper is Confederate.

It always comes down to this.

“Clothing with names is the #1 thing that leads to kidnapping”