He had it coming, but no - I'm referring to the prison, but I got to leave for 12 hours a day, I don't show up for 30 meetings with my probation officer deal.

And the fucking rewriting of RECENT history continues apace. https://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2016/12/hillary-clinton-working-class/509477/

Okay, but I don't have paper napkins. You're going to have to use cloth or linen.

I love that only the women laughed at the hymen jokes.

Well, it’s Old White Guy. Just about every comment he makes involves his tongue being thoroughly lodged in his cheek.

I’m sorry.

There is a *passable* cashew cream cheese that my sister buys at the local hippy-dippy store (Google fails me), but real cheese? The stuff you put on pizza? Nope. Don't know of anything. Sorry. 😞

In light of all of the information that just came out about the sweetheart deal Jeffrey Epstein got, this is.... incredibly ironic.

Planned Parenthood has been saving our collective asses for decades. Every time Congress or a state passed some dipshit, fucked up rule limiting women’s access to reproductive care, Planned Parenthood was in court, fighting for our rights.

I would totally donate to that.

Ohio is fucked by its state representatives. The largest proportion of the population lives in the major cities - Cleveland, Dayton, Toledo, Akron, Cincinnati, and Columbus. If Ohio ran strictly on voting numbers, we would be a blue state (the cities are almost universally blue. Cleveland voted for Hillary Clinton at…

We’re getting daily updates, right? I'm here for updates!

She may be referring to a different type of NDA - such as Federal Criminal Rule of Procedure 6.

I was in Virginia several years ago, and I was told to go to the “slave market” downtown, because it was such an amazing historical site - and there was a Starbucks nearby. It was horrifying. Very little context - just an area where slaves were apparently chained up and auctioned off, surrounded by restaurants and the…

True dat. Internal promotes almost always get screwed.

We accidentally went to a bar that was holding a speed dating event (they were advertising cheap margaritas). We were approached by so many eager dudes. My friend is hot. I am not.

How?

Attorney - same deal.

I can’t measure for shit. I’ll measure something two or three times, cut, and realize that I cut too much off.

Fuck. You.