“Death to America, death to Israel, damnation to the Jews.”

Exactly: a crazed Hogwarts professor who has borrowed Jeremy Clarkson’s teeth for the weekend.

I know the parking brake is higher than the other pedals, but I still get very squeamish with that setup in a manual. There’s plenty of room for a handbrake between the seats, and it’s better for hooning, anyway.

I’m sure the rest of the PDI was just as thorough. Sure there’s oil in the car?

I got Kinja’d. ;)

Second Amendment Woman Liberates Bacon from Tyranny of Absence.

I kind of like the chutzpah of people who stick with a name, regardless of how much amusement it may cause others. I still have the business card of an old colleague - Mike Hunt. Not Michael, not Mikey, Not Mick. And he’d introduce himself that way at every client meeting.

All true, but he only died in 2013, so I imagine the last couple of decades of his life were full of people trying to keep a straight face when they were introduced to him.

Competitive weed vaping would be pretty hilarious, however. “Last man standing” indeed.

No, it’s only designed for “aromatherapeutic herbs,” at least according to the instructions that came with my vape. I was pretty baked when I read the manual, however, so I could be wrong.

Someone named their son Dick Trickle, so anything’s possible.

It’s called the “California Highway Cycle” and is meant to simulate the real world driving behavior of SUV owners on West Coast interstates. Actually, it looks like only 50% of the CHC is on show. The full test requires the vehicle to lurch from the extreme left of the lane to the extreme right and back, in a roughly…

“Automobiles are inherently mobile, and increasingly they contain equipment that would commonly be considered computing devices.” So they’re mobile computers, QED!!!

“The decision to employ access controls to hinder unauthorized “tinkering” with these vital computer programs is necessary in order to protect the safety and security of drivers and passengers...”

Agreed. Unfortunately, petty people with a lot of time on their hands can be a significant force for ill, albeit in a limited arena. Never underestimate the power of a twerp on a mission.

So, it’s the aeronautical equivalent of tripping on a paving slab, then skipping away so nobody will think you tripped? Totally pulled it off, dude.

She was famed for her acerbic wit, but I agree the story does sound too perfect, and the original account of it was at a “friend of a friend” remove.

Diderot a perfect phrase for it: L’esprit de l’escalier. The perfect retort that only comes to mind when you’re on the stairs after leaving the room where you could have deployed said retort to devastating effect.

I felt your story so much, too, both on it’s own and because I have a similar story from my own middle school years. Few things in life are more wounding than what feels like an entire gym-full of middle-schoolers laughing at you.

An American colleague (relevant) tells this one about himself. He was on a plane in Japan, on final approach to Hiroshima, when he noticed how new the city’s architecture appeared from the window. His Japanese traveling companion replied, “yes, we had a fresh start in 1945.”