the dark green deep plunge? oooohh my god give it to me

• Kimmy: I’m never gonna get my high school diploma. I need Dong!
  Titus: Trust me, that’s not gonna solve all your problems.
  Kimmy: Dong is the name of the Vietnamese guy in my class. He’s good at math.
  Titus: That’s racist!
  Kimmy: But he is good at math.
  Titus: I don’t make the rules.

I was walking along the west side of central park last month and saw the Haddad’s trucks and signs saying they were filming “UKS”.

I AM SO READY. Netflix has been yawn-worthy lately.

New Unbreakable. New Archer. New BoJack. And hopefully new F is for Family.

Interns.

Generosity is really, really awesome, but the city of Detroit, and the state of Michigan by extension, should have never fucking let it get this bad. It shouldn’t be up to rich celebrities to provide basic public necessities.

no....its my song

It puts the dentures in the cup.

I haven’t read Diaz’s book so I hope it is more of an existential exploration of the situation of women in time and not a collection of empty reassurances. For my part, I wish that someone had told me that the worst thing about being a woman would be the special significance that getting older has. Because I honestly…

Because consensual BDSM play has nothing to do with actual rape. Many sex-positive feminists engage in BDSM without it conflicting or cancelling out their feminist politics.

Muscle is awesome. In my mind I would have replied, “Getting muscle. Want to see?” Then overhead press him out the window.

This story only starts out like a horror story. It was horrible for me at the time. My boyfriend and I were celebrating our first Thanksgiving together. It was also just a couple years since my Mom died, a loss which had blasted a huge hole in our family. We scattered after that and had Thanksgivings either alone or…

Once, my uncle asked “So Mark, you’re a vegetarian now?” while we were eating at a restaurant. I thought that he was just interested in trying it, so I beamed and said “Yes!”

He’s getting paid to play on a banana and sing with Adele. I’d be loving life, too.

I would really love to be besties with Adele. I feel like she is to me what T.Swift is to younger millennials.

I lost it when I saw the guy with the banana but they still did great.

High Five!

Oh, honey, please what is this amateur nonsense. I am the Queen of Sleep. I am a sleep pro. You get an A for effort, but your execution is all wrong.

“He’s not coming”