NO LIFE & STYLE. This is not “the Queen Mum”, this is the actual QUEEN OF ENGLAND, ELIZABETH II. “The Queen Mum” was mother, who was also named Elizabeth; the nickname was supposed to help avoid this confusion but apparently it’s ineffective on stupid American tabloids.

UPDATE: My friends insisted that I return after only 3 days. The place still blows.

*Ahspenn/Dhackoda

If anyone wants to read more earnest-yet-sometimes-pithy reviews of church services, go to the Ship of Fools (the Magazine of Christian Unrest) and browse the Mystery Worshipper archive. Mystery Worshippers have the option of leaving their card on the collection plate. Services get marked on things including the…

I guess community easter egg hunts serve a purpose for families that don’t have a yard, but back in my day my parents just hid a bunch of stuff in the bushes and let me go. It was me against the local squirrels (and the dog, after she broke her leash) in a race for the chocolate. Then it was time to race to the…

“Restaurant food was decent but I had to provide my own bread and wine. The next day I was nailed to a plank of wood and died. Would not recommend.”

I don’t remember black people being so shiny and vapid.

Oh for fuck’s sake.

Jesus always struck me as the crossfit type.

I'm just wondering if Jezebel is ever going to leave Bruce Jenner alone. At least I would hope this website would drop it's facade that it gives any fucks at all about queer/trans peoples lives while it insists on joining in on all the trans speculation fun. Linking to radar. My fucking word. Radar is responsible for…

Oh man, I was about 13 when Titanic mania hit. We left the theater once and 2 bored teenage boys were on tissue duty for all the ladies weeping over how Jack could totally have fit on that board with Kate. Movie tissues could be a thing.

I'm also a little bothered by Jez breathlessly passing along rumors about Bruce Jenner's transition. I know this is Dirtbag, but why not give that one topic a break?

I kind of feel like this writer's Dirtbags are sort of judgmental all around. I'm not enjoying it... is it just me? :/

Is there even a point to that reference? Like, what part of the Beyoncé + fancy dress* + ?? equation equals Jay Z jizzing on it? Do I just not listen to enough pop music? Am I old?

•Jay Z had better not Monica Lewinski all over this dope-ass dress Yoncé wore while on the prowl in New York. [Daily Mail]

I'm sure Monica Lewinsky would be very happy to see your reference above. https://www.ted.com/talks/monica_l…

That's just so much awesome - people probably couldn't look directly at them and had to avert their eyes. Uncomfortable.

You know what? Keanu Reeves.

Maybe it's because I don't have a half-finished screenplay crammed up my ass, but I think it's beautiful and I'm looking forward to the movie.