Also, the word, 'lovers'. Totally squicks me out.

There is a kid selling lemonade on the corner. I heard he's going to be appointed CEO of Pepsi next week.

Me too! Some of them never even told me their names, they just turned the corner at the next street and ended our relationship...

"...but this is the US where illness is a bad choice made by the patient."

If you think Suri Cruise was created to backup an image of a sham-marriage, you're not looking deep enough. Suri Cruise was created for one thing and one thing only: world domination. She is the force that will align the rebels and bring the revolution.

Oh, well yeah, a band is different. Worth it. I just never understood why people would stand outside and freeze their nuts off to get into some bar when there were 8 more on the same block.

I feel like the rule needs to be: don't send dick picks when they're unsolicited, period. If you wanted a dick pick two hours into the date and he wanted to oblige, I don't see a problem (and sexting is hardly the death of Modern Woo...). It's the fact that it wasn't requested that made it inappropriate, not…

This is awesome, I'm going to apply to work at Starbuck's and then tell them my religion forbids me from serving people caffeinated products. And then I'm going to apply at McDonald's and tell them that I will not be serving anyone any beef products because I'm a Hindu and see how far that goes. And then I'm going…

Yeah sorry, but this just bugs me. It sounds like they're all being really disrespectful to you.

if you move into his existing space, communicate to make it shared space. Which dishes, where does your dresser fit, closet space, etc. talk about what you want on the walls. You don't want to feel like a guest in his space, and he might have a bit of shock over his loss of space.

"Man Cave" is so fucking annoying to hear. The only guys I know who use it are basically overgrown 12 year-olds who feel so robbed of something they need "man space." I like it when my wife hangs out with me in the garage drinking beers from the old fridge and playing swivel-chair darts.

I would take ten million if it meant we could get rid of one of you

*snort*

In 1943, my then three-year-old mother had a pretty classic assignment—she was supposed to walk down the aisle with a basket of rose petals, throwing them as she went.

My nephew so badly wanted to be the ring bearer for my husband and I that he started petitioning before we were even engaged. He was a little upset that he did not get to wear a tux, but enthusiastic about the ring pillow. So enthusiastic that he dropped the rings 3 times and lost them for about fifteen minutes in…

Aww, you don't sound like a bad flower girl.

Can I tell a cute one? My 2 year old flower girl did great (walked down the aisle by dad). She slowed things down considerably because she insisted on placing each petal one at a time on the runner instead of dropping handfuls. At the end of the aisle she had one petal left and no more runner so after looking around…

I crashed my aunts wedding party. My sister was 6 and picked to be the flower girl. I was 3 and deemed too young. I flipped the fuck out in anger and jealousy. My grandma was a bit passive aggressive, I guess, and made my sister's flower girl dress and made me one to match. Day of the wedding I flipped out with a…

I was the flower girl at my aunt's wedding when I was about 5. When I reached the last couple of pews, I got bored and decided I was done so I tried to hand the basket of flowers off to a great-aunt or whoever that was.

This information lacks what we really need to figure out, who's a good boy?