His streak of futility was impressive, but nothing compared to Generalissimo Francisco Franco’s streak of being dead.

DA “Would you say that you are a fan of the Patriots?”

“Truth is, the only person who’s life is at risk is Kats himself, said Dawkins, who prints and makes shirts for Katsandris.

The world was built by intense weirdos. We stand on the shoulders of weird giants.

You can’t really dress up as an Indian or cowboy anymore, and recently a lot of the public has turned on the police. There just aren’t a lot of good options left.

Big dogs, big rockets, big man of color, doing big science.

“Well, my days of taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.”

I’d also add the whole bit about its current head coach referencing Penn State’s Big Ten championship as part of the “healing process.” Also when the students held a pep rally to celebrate the end of sanctions a few years back...that was a nice flavor of hideous.

The Cubs will use this to draft prospects with really tight ligaments after bone breaks. I saw a documentary about twenty years ago that showed one such case.

Mine, neither. My doctor’s name Is Weinstein. I don’t think he’s a time traveller, though.

Come to my house on Thanksgiving, you’ll find him yelling at the TV. I call him Uncle.

It’s been less than 48 hours and the parade hasn’t even concluded, and people are already saying this shit. Anybody already saying Cubs fans should shut up is far more annoying than Cubs fans.

Knoblauch used to flash that same smile throwing to first, knowing he was making some lucky fan’s day with a free souvenir.

They switched leagues and became the Phoenix Coyotes.

Look, we all know this was coming. Let me just get it out of the way now.

There is no Rita, only Zuul.

“a mummified Peyton Manning”

Sure he did, cry and promise not to tell anyone.