Fiscally conservative, socially liberal = The problems, they’re bad. But the causes, those are good

Loch Ness is just, you know, a specific lake (loch) in Scotland and is thus unlikely to rise up from another lake. Now the Loch Ness Monster, on the other hand...

The only thing she’s even remotely sorry about is that she was caught being racist. She’s not sorry for the racism, just the fact that it’s been documented

She’s going to get run out of her neighborhood regardless. The lawsuit, if she’s dumb enough to file it, will not only be thrown out but will almost definitely result in her being ordered to pay any legal fees incurred by the target of her petty insecure racist bullshit

If Philip J. Fry can kill and become his own grandfather, how hard can it be?

You didn’t need to add the word “apparently”, it’s abundantly and horrifyingly obvious that a lot of people don’t get it

One of the worst cases of the flu I’ve ever had I came down with about a week after getting that season’s flu shot. And I still get a flu shot every year because, thanks to my not being a complete and utter fucking moron, I understand that the timing of that and the incubation period for the flu means that I had…

Considering the relatively small amount of money that Brown is being sued for ($15K is peanuts for him) and the fact that the dude suing him is apparently loaded himself, this actually seems like anything but a cash grab. Rather, it seems like a concerned father is trying to make sure that Antonio Brown accepts…

As embarrassing as the banner is, it’s not nearly as embarrassing as the fact that they brought Austin “suspended 27 games after pleading no contest in a domestic violence incident” Watson out onto the ice to participate in the ceremony

Are you talking to me?

It’s also insane to claim that this sort of thing (i.e. guys on the team playing video games in their spare time) is even remotely new. During Iginla’s heyday the Flames used to have cords taped down all over their charter plane so the guys could have a LAN parties, 20 years ago guys were bringing N64's with them and…

With the Patriots loss to the Lions and the Vikings loss to the Bills, is there anybody left standing in any survivor pools at this point?

I’m not saying that it’s a good, or even reasonable, rule, just that the way that Matthews tackled Smith is literally a perfect example of the type of hit that the league has decided it has to eliminate.

I’m a Bears fan so I’m obviously not the most objective observer here, but yeah love it or hate it there’s a rule specifically in place now against landing with all of your body weight on the QB and that’s exactly what Matthews did there. The penalty last week (and the league’s explanation defending it) was complete…

1) As hilarious (and deserved) as it would be, Jon Gruden is 100% not getting fired anytime soon. Not only does he have the most ludicrous contract of any coach in any sport, but the Raiders are doubling down and giving him more control. After the impending nuclear winter the only remnants of Earth as we know it will…

Die-hard Blackhawks fan here. Did the ‘Hawks party hard after their Cup wins? Without a fucking doubt. Does their level of partying compare to the Caps from this summer? Not even fucking close. The Caps have established a new standard for how to celebrate a championship, one which I sincerely doubt anyone will ever…

This is the correct take. Regular Sam Adams is garbage, but Sam Adams Octoberfest is fucking delicious. I also tried their pumpkin seasonal for the first time last fall and loved it - pumpkin spice lattes are for basic bitches, but give me ALL of the pumpkin beers damn it

I fail to see how they’re mutually exclusive. If you’re held until Tuesday from your Sunday drunk and disorderly charge then either you were so absolutely shitfaced that you didn’t even wake up on Monday or they were successfully able to get you on a 48 hour psych hold, either way you’re fucking insane

In any sort of just society he’d never see the light of day from outside a prison again; 15 years is complete bullshit, the fact that it’ll probably end up being only half of that is doubly complete bullshit. But it says something about the horrifying state of the justice system in general, and in particular when the…

To be fair, losing to the Bears - especially last season’s iteration with Mike Glennon at QB - is incredibly fucking embarrassing and should probably count as more than 1 loss. And for the record, I’m a Bears fan