Are you kidding me? How fast would his mother smash him upside the head with a frying pan for that kind of nonsense.

“You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media write as long as you’ve got a young, and beautiful, piece of ass.” - Donald Trump

So, I was seeing an awesome dude for the past 2 months and fucked it up. Real bad. Like, torpedoed the hell out of that shit and blew it up from every direction possible. I’m not looking for sympathy because it’s all on me, and I don’t want to go into details about what a huge asshole I am.

I’ve been through this. In 2013, my husband moved us from the midwest to Los Angeles, promptly began fucking a mutual friend, and decided our marriage was over (or, if you believe his initial ramblings ‘I’m not sure I even, like, believe in marriage at all’).

Excellent dog. 12/10.

That’s so exciting! Good luck! I’m not sure what field you’re in but I brush up on any news related to the field I’m interviewing for. Sometimes employers will ask about current events related to your field just to see if it’s something you’re passionate about. For example I was once asked “what stock would you tell…

The part I hate most in interviews is when they ask “Do you have any questions for us?”. I feel like a dunce if I say no.

True, you see someone juggle flaming, running chainsaws and think “meh” that’s been done before, and then you see a dog juggle just one juggling pin and are amazed he can do so. It’s so weird that people perceive an amazing performance based on expectation rather than accomplishment.

I can’t fathom how anyone can possibly be undecided in this election.

I really like this idea. I’m fluent in French and the most I regularly do with it in the US is when I’m trying to get out of a conversation with a stranger. Can’t chit chat if I don’t speak English!

Sometimes marriages are just done and it’s not a third party’s fault. Unpopular opinion, I realize.

In response to Michelle’s comments, Melania Trump said, “Uh, no, not really. No, because you have to be in it, if you’re in it, and if you don’t agree you’d should have agreed before they ran. Bottom line is, if I didn’t agree with what Barack was saying, I would not support his run. So...I stand there proudly, and I…

Goddamn I’m gonna miss her.

Blue Shirt: Check

I earnestly believe that Mr. Trump is a very real danger to this country that I love so much. I’m both shocked and depressed that he’s the Republican nominee for president.

Oh DAMN.

America: you have just two skittles to choose from, and one will DEFINITELY KILL YOU.

OK, I did a 5 minute “investigation”... Corey Feldman said that “Haim was just 11 when... a man raped him on a movie set”. I checked when Corey Haim was 11, it would be 1983, so I checked which movie of his came out in 1984 and it was “Firstborn” and the A-List Actor that is in it is Robert Downey Jr. I don’t know if…

Why is everything a dick measuring contest with him? FFS.