Please show yourself out.

I think I might die of dehydration about 30 minutes in.

This is dog.

"We don't know how to write this, so let's just kill everyone."

That's what your mom said.

That is abswoleutely fapulous.

Not to be confused with the obvious porn parody, Starship Toppers.

Well, we finally got that Power Rangers movie.

Yes, but heck, when Riker turned down the Melbourne after serving as XO of the Hood for ~3 years and XO of the Enterprise for ~3 years, it was the *THIRD TIME* he turned down his own command.

Man, Starfleet doesn't sound like a very good organization when it comes to advancement and cycling. XO of the same ship for SEVEN YEARS? She should have been given a command by that point. Heck, she should have cycled to a shore posting at some point in that seven years.

Or, better advice for FOMO: validate your girlfriend's attraction and tell her it's fine if she wants to hook up with that other girl. If you're really looking for that threesome, ASK if she'll consider a search for someone you're *both* attracted to. She's happy to pass for *you*, reward that by being happy to let…

Considering the way we're wrecking our climate, ALL animals are endangered, so may as well eat them while you can!

Daimler Lama? Ahura Mazda? WE MAY BE ONTO SOMETHING HERE.

Glad to see NBC and Alex Jones jerking into each others' mouths for mutual benefit.

biop-ick?

We are, but I've known about the ball-tripping ball throw-a-thon for a while, I just never realized dude's name was so punnable.

Thanks for making me feel dumb for not realizing this earlier.

While I completely sympathize with someone in a basically sexless marriage, I kind of feel bad for the guy who has to sneak around his own house to get his nut off, and has a spouse who has "busted" him, probably with no small amount of shaming involved.

Yeah, I suppose. She hit her peak in The Adventures of Tracy Dick: The Case of the Missing Stiff, but it's been kind of downhill since then.

If there's not a scene with a cargo plane filled with rubber dog shit leaving from Hong Kong, this movie will have failed catastrophically.