“So as a man, I stand before you as president, but if I weren’t president, I wouldn’t be happy to hear that statement. That would be a very scary statement to me because there’s no way we can compete with you. So I would not be happy. I just wouldn’t be happy.”

This, all day long.

That tweet just broke my brain.

I can’t afford a long summer vacation - but that’s why I want it.

As an American, I would also like to know this.

dufuq did I just read.

Fair.

Subtle foreplay in the club is tacky. Chlamydia is at least curable :)

I assumed that was the endgame.

FUCK RETAINERS.

I will admit that I did not give a fuck about voting until 25 or so. But I woke the fuck up in 2008.

Growing up in the age of Trump. I would better for my liver if I were blissfully unaware of his fuckery.

Growing up in the age of Trump. I would better for my liver if I were blissfully unaware of his fuckery.

OH FOR FUCKS SAKE

I’ve got nothing against Oprah, but if we start to make it a habit of electing celebrities as our president...

That shark GETS ME

My philosophy on VBS is go big or go home. If I’m hanging strap, it’s gonna be bright red or hot pink or neon green. Or black if I’m feeling classy.

If Twitter is what gets this chode impeached, I may implode from the schadenfreude. 

Yes it was!