Anybody who thinks it's hypocritical for us to hate rape and like sex isn't very good at thinking.

Being non-consensually assailed with violent, graphic imagery of rape porn is not even close to the same thing as voluntarily looking at porn that appeals to you.

Are you really saying jokey pictures of naked cartoon characters (in an article you have to choose to click on, with a NSWF warning) are in any way comparable to rape and gore gifs of actual people sent to people without warning?

"Am i missing something?"

1) I don't even think Cutthroat Kitchen would force chefs to do something this diabolical.

Yes, we will do that on the same day that anyone gives a shit about what you think.

And he's quite premature at e-jac-u-la-ting....

The whole time we were working on this, I couldn't get this out of my head:

I will be taking credit for Prince Eric, whom Kelly and I fought over like his was the last dick on earth. (And by that I mean we disagreed on what his penis looks like.)

It explains so much. The vaguely phallic antler decorations. The obsession with a trophy wife. Lashing out when Belle clearly cares about the Beast (whose dick would surely be far bigger than it is in his human state).

Give Tara all the art awards.

No one's slick as Gaston

I used to live in Central NY and that's where I first witnessed ranch abuse— One good friend was trying to lose weight before getting gastric bypass, and she was so proud of herself for eating salads for lunch that would be just lettuce swimming in ranch. Our office had a garden, and there would frequently be produce…

I visited an assisted living and had lunch there. Everyone - virtually all the residents - put ranch dressing on their red jell-o. I asked a worker about it, and she said one person started it and it just spread, and now the people all wanted it that way.

It wouldn't really mix, though, would it? It's not going to be some half-dressing half-tea emulsification, just tea with gloppy globs floating in it.

I'm British and I never had ranch dressing until I went to Orlando when I was about 10. I had a salad with ranch and I puked (I think it was partly the sun and too much sugar at Universal, but to this day even the smell of ranch makes me nauseated).

I wholeheartedly stand by my sentiments. Fucking fuck that.

That was pretty much my reaction as I was reading it. I was okay until the part about the tea but just imagining that is making me feel a little sick.

The Lyin', the Witch, and the Wardrobe

I was JUST thinking "HEY IT MIGHT BE TIME FOR BCO" and then IT APPEARED.