So wait... you mean that we’re never getting ESPN8: the Ocho?

Far Left comments on Far Right.

“Typical. A little late tackling the O-ring problem.”

Is he Snake Plissken’s non-union, Mexican equivalent???

Got halfway through and had to page back up to see if Magary wrote this.

Perfect. $1,300 to read comics. Sounds like a good investment.

IT’S ALSO CALLED CROSSY ROAD.

Why Your Team Sucks 2015: Apple

Kyle, can you just do all the Apple coverage for all Gawker sites from now on? This is the only article I’ve seen today that isn’t trying to fellate Apple for showing the world a hundred dollar pencil.

This is the first thing I see when I open the internet today. Who knew a 15 year old from Iowa could give me such joy on my birthday? I feel like Jared Fogle.