My brother plays men's varsity, and his equipment alone costs around $500 per season before factoring in shoes and jerseys and stuff like that. His pads and helmet end up needing to be replaced at least every season, if not more often.

Bullshit. No one that age can control their Wii

That Jason Isbell tune reminds me of this:

And then Dwight was all "Ice Whobe?" and Ice was all "more like Blight Howard" and Dwight was all "more like Ice Lube" and Ice was all "wait what does that even mean?" and Dwight was all "haven't you ever used Cooling Effects™ sexual lubricant?" and Ice was all "oh I've heard of that but it's not available in my area"…

Pretty amazing that every single person in Alaska voted.

My attempt to appease the interwebs with their unheard calls.

Interesting. When I heard a retired athlete was going to be spending time in the minors 'round rock, I naturally just assumed it would be Lawrence Taylor.

The diversity of colors on that chair are not acceptable for a Rocker.

Hell, I'd argue Hernandez is hewing much closer to the Patriot Way now that he's in jail. He'll sleep on a straw cot, shit into a pot, and be owned by another human being.

Well isn't that Precious.

Honestly I like that better than those "Just do whatever you think is best, man." Karl Malone billboards.

This one is too easy. Aaron Hernandez is just like Detective Nordberg from the Naked Gun movies.

Ah, so that explains the contingent of Basketball groupies at the Sting concert last week.

The guy goes balls out every night.

Just so you know those athletes pay the locker room or clubhouse attendant/manager a pretty fair amount in tips each time so all of those delicious foods and drinks are not really free.

More than anything, Glen, I want you to kill people.

Unfortunate birds

Wow, those poor people look like they were run over by a tank.

Manziel: "Don't you know who I am?"

Good on Steve. He sounds like a real stand up guy.