Rather than continue to watch these two generic Midwestern teams play each other, I'm making the switch to Cheers Season 5, Episode 23: Norm's First Hurrah, on Netflix.

Jesus T.F. Christ

It's a fucking basketball, not a pumpkin.

Looks like this is going to be a battle

What an awful, awful basketball game. Has Baylor run anything close to an organized offense the entire game? I mean Kentucky is obviously talented and looks good, but Baylor is equally painful to watch.

No they didn't. Back to the dust courts and corn cob rims of French Lick.

When I tried to friend Anthony Morrow on Facebook, he sent back a message saying IONO

Somebody get Kendall Marshall an in-game morphine drip going for Sunday.

You, Me, and Dupree

I'm just gonna say it...I don't like the Doritos taco at Taco Bell.

"Listen, I wasn't your prototypical Baylor student..."

Why do I have to be subjected to the guy from Full Metal Jacket questioning my love of motorcycles and calling me "Sweet Lips"?

"My God, what have I done?"

There's an AFL team in Kentucky taking in coaches displaced by Hurricane Goodell.

The sandwich may have been enlarged for effect. Typical Madison Avenue suits.

Stay classy, NC State

What?

Scott Raab doesn't wipe.