Unfortunately, I live in Mobile. And we fucking love our trees. LOVE THEM. We damn near had riots when the Holiday Inn cut down a few hundred year oaks - especially when it was discovered that they had drawn up plans to work around the trees and then decided it was easier to cut them down and pay some fines than…

I’ve been saying happy holidays forever, because it covers the entire spectrum of holidays, including New Years. People need to get the fuck over themselves.

57 is elderly now?

Could anything be more representative of the next four years?

It’d be really nice if we as a culture would no longer accept apologies after the act as an excuse to not punish for the aforementioned act.

It’s a huge brand by one of the most famous make-up artists...pretty ubiquitous 

I can’t decide if you are very young or just very weird.

Ooh thanks for this! Reading about their feud always brightens my day.

And if Michelle Obama had refused to live in the White House like Princess Melania is doing, the world would have exploded in 2008.

This family is disgusting and representative of everything wrong with our legal system. If these people lived in Compton, Brooklyn, or Newark, they would all be in jail, with the kid not getting out until he was stooped and gray.

This. Every word. Also, I’m assuming Ivanka will still be running her own business while being First Lady since rules don’t matter anymore.

I’ve said this a few times... I have a sneaking, creeping, not unrealistic fear that the first woman president of the United States will be Ivanka Trump Kushner. Also, the first Jewish president.

This is my response to all the old white folks in my family who voted for Trump:

I was with you until ‘Fuck Seinfeld’. Sorry: it’s a great show.

true - more than half the country saw right through him.

No kids, but I grew up poor- and I looked forward to Christmas because my mom went out of her way to make it an experience. She would find all the free holiday events in the area and take us and buy small gifts for a dollar or less and do our own 12 days of Christmas. She’d make popcorn and we’d watch a different…

Yeah, I don’t really get this ridiculously cynical essay. Your kids will experience the adversity necessary to build character soon enough without your conscious interference.

“There is a part of me that wants my kids to feel, at least in some relatively painless and abstract way, that the world is fucked.”

I didn’t realize your 3 and 5 year old were personally responsible for the state of the world but if you really feel like ruining their Christmas instead of doing anything proactive like, oh, I don’t know, contacting your senator or volunteering with an organization that’s actively affected by the state of things,…

Why does anyone think she cares or is going to listen to any of this? Because she’s a woman? So is KellyAnne Conway. Ivanka has made it painfully clear where she stands on her father’s political career.