I try not to keep useless stuff in my kitchen, but I do have a large hand painted ceramic bowl that I want to trash. Except I can’t because my grandmother COMMISSIONED the damn thing for me. It has SPRINGER SPANIELS painted on it. One of which is sitting in an easy chair reading a law book.

That story is making my blood pressure rise, fucking entitled parents are the worrrrrrst.

I can tell you what’s more precious than an unborn child. Educating, feeding, clothing, and sheltering low income children, and watching them break the cycle of poverty.

Song for the Lawnly.

Gypsies, Tramps and Leaves

If I Could Turn Back Thyme

Okay, but this is a Samsung.

For years I lived a mile down the road from where they were abducted and I thought of them often.

Ew. Why would you want to do this? Isn’t the keepsake the baby? Your memories? Why do you need to turn your breastmilk into a pendent?

So I’m guessing Florida.

I’m a family law attorney, and my office has been up in arms about this all week.

Now we’re incarcerating children because of their parents’ behavior? WTF is this world that I am living in?

If someone could’ve taught me how to differentiate razor burn from genital herpes, it would’ve saved me a lot of grief in this department....key takeaway: nothing like having a bunch of Greek doctors laugh at you and your labia.

#NotMyCats

I’[ve watched it repeatedly and keep noticing new things too. Hey, did you notice in the first episode when they’re on The Today Show, one of the “Mole Women” calls Matt Lauer, Bryant?

...goddammit, I know that’s just a calculated political move but I’ll be damned if it doesn’t warm the rusty, empty and necrotic cockles of my useless, cold heart.

Just a LittleCheeser and bro hangin’ out at the neighborhood pool. This was as beachy as we got. Had to keep watering down the slide or else we’d burn going down—real OG stuff.

not sure if this will work since kinja’s being kinja today.