I was going with “Gudetama barf,” but OK.

only a crack whore would eat that garbage

I mean, sure, we could have just said “some doohickeys get in the way of other doohickies,” but that’s not enough. You have a RIGHT to know WHAT doohickeys and HOW they move and WHY. Don’t fear knowlegde: embrace it.

I’ll also note that we all thought this would be a super easy story but then we lost Jason and David for weeks while they worked on this having no idea how unbelievably complicated it would turn out.

This is so fucked up there are no words.

Future list of required school supplies:

#2 Pencils
24 ct Crayola crayons
TI-84 graphing calculator (they’ll never retire that overpriced piece of garbage)
scissors (medical grade)
glue sticks
bulletproof backpack
ruler
graph paper
disinfecting wipes
Ruger GP100 ‘SafeSchools’ model child defense revolver (gun safe optional)
penci…

This is the most republican thing I have seen in a long time. No we aren’t going to change the laws to help keep kids safe and stop mass shootings. Instead we are going to capitalize on parents fears and market new “school shooting proof” items to the masses. They are cashing in on mass school shootings and fear. This…

I missed the segment where they were showing the bulletproof blankies for preschool naptime. Did anyone catch that?

Uzicorn....*snickers*

My classes start up next week. After going through the syllabus and core course policies, I will—as I have for the last thirteen years or so—go over my university’s active shooter policy.

I’ve worked for three institutions in the course of my career. The policy at each was more or less the same: if the shooter’s not in…

I now understand why I get looks on vacation when I present my american passport. Other countries are totally justified in thinking we’re complete nuts...

I’m sure those will be available for a slight extra cost. Always have an upsell.

Not to mention those inserts are 8-10lbs.
Sure your kid’s back is all fucked up, but at least he/she didn’t get shot right?!

I don’t think there’s been a single day since this all started when I haven’t thought “how is this actual reality?"

Meh. the market has already been opened.

Welcome to Hell World! Where the only shocking thing anymore is the frequency of comparisons of real life to Onion headlines.

Even with the ceramic insert, it’ll only stop one round dead-on. Maybe two. Maybe.

Our senior DI impressed this upon my BCT class many, many times; he’d been on something like four combat tours in Iraq (I signed up in 2009, when I was 27), and had taken two shots in quick succession to the chest plate of his gear.

The…

Yeah but American’s are too stupid to know stuff like that. They think teflon is some magic that stops all bullets except those insane armor-piercing cop-killer bullets that are so tough to buy.

This is some Darkest Timeline shit.

“In the U.S., sadly, there’s the guns, everybody can have a gun,”