Does not doing it work? Clearly no. So let’s try.

Tbh I’d be worried about catching an STD from a Kennedy . They’re druggy, slutty jet setters, not Puritans.

He’s making me cry talking about how we dishonor the parents by doing nothing.

Condoms: for those days when you’re smoking crack and having sex with your wife’s boyfriend, while she’s secretly videotaping you.

Oldie, goodie.

also now I have this in my head.

Sorry Yoko but telling a child you love her with thoughts is nowhere near as good as telling her with words. Although now that I think about it maybe Yoko has super laser brainwaves that those she loves can feel.

I know, let’s get the aerial folks from Spiderman the Musical in there! They know all about flying and safety.

You think I’m not confused? I have no idea who I am most of the time.

I think you’d fit in better at Gawker.

and where is that pro-beauty-industry Millihelen replacement we were promised? Wasn’t that supposed to bring in the big bucks? Stupid Denton.

you can have lots of Twitter accounts though (with different pictures of January Jones on them to help you keep them straight).

Huh, that would never occur to me. I’m not a good twatter.

Wait we’ve already soured on the Shura song?

I really, really love slow movies but I can’t stand Winding Refn. I feel like he’s anti-intellectual and callous about violence. Bugs me that Julianne would lump him in with Dogme.

There’s so much emptiness in the pairing of director and subject that I’m afraid it will generate a black hole and swallow the galaxy . Mr. facile shiny surface meets the industry of appearances. Is it for people who thought Spring Breakers was too deep?

He has the worst hair on the show, like the actor didn’t have enough clout to still keep flattering hair like Keri Russell or Dylan Baker did. They said “dude, we’re giving you 80's fluffiness and no arguing.”

The DC thing is weird, like how long has he been in Washington and he hasn’t noticed it’s not exactly his voting base?

oh she is the worst! I’ve hated her since she was on Joan Rivers’ talk show ages ago and she was awful on I’m a Celeb.

I can’t stand him. His wife seems OK, even though she was trying to blackmail them.