Your mother is so stupid, she thinks Gotham is a program with intelligent writing and fascinating characters that rivals The Wire in quality.

What is it with this world's criminals and witticisms of some kind? Jokes and riddles are all well and good. But then there's pranks, clues, puzzles, answers, etc. Seriously, how many of those are left?

I did end up meeting my imposter once again. Or at the very least, his Earth-2 doppleganger. Either way, it was very…EnjOYaBlE.

Ah, yes, Earth-3. I assume my counterpart there was either a habadasher, a neurobiologist, or some form of literary scholar. And probably married to a woman named Alice.

And even then, it would still be MILES better than Gotham

Your mother is so fat, she stares "Rabbit in a Snowstorm" every night.

Agreed. I can think of at least 14.

Sorry to crush your (and everyone else's) dreams, but she has to live to give Gordon his daughter AND his son. Maybe. Not sure if the show will go that route.

Wrong Barbara, Napier. Wait a few years.

Really? For most, it's Oswald. And, come to think of it, this episode didn't do him any favors, either. After tonight, I'm relatively certain that Gotham hates all of us. I'm sorry that your personal bright spot has been swallowed by Gotham's unnecessary darkness.

Oh, come now, Eddie. Come and join the camaraderie!

Why, thank you my gigantic and terrifying friend! In truth, I suspected I might get the anvil, so I grabbed my specially reinforced hat plated with Nth metal. I made it a long time ago and never used it. Not even sure it would work, honestly.

I wish I didn't laugh at that. But I did. I definitely did. Credit, Mr. Napier. Not quite the meter I would have used, but still. I tip my hat to you.

Ah, yes! And, if I recall, the voice was Paul Reubens! You know, he sounds a lot like Bat-Mite, weirdly enough.

His blood, prehaps? Blue bloods and all that. And I must agree with your assessment of that pretender. If they ever adapt me in this show, let me borrow that machine. I'll stop that before it starts.

Why, hello, Napier. Wondering where you've been for the past few weeks. Keeping yourself busy, I hope?

Oh, science has nothing to do with this. If it did, I'd be ranting about the Scarecrow episode. No, no, this is about realism. The fact that you actually expected ANYTHING cool and subtle in this show after that is a genuine miracle of nature.

Cool and subtle? You're actually asking this of the show that had a villain that used giant weather balloons to lift his victims into the atmosphere? In the THIRD EPISODE??

Well, what a coincidence! It's also my unbirthday! I'll prepare the tea and cake if you prepare the drinks!

eXcuSE Me! Just because you're tall and I'm short does NOT give you license to belittle me, sir! That is heightist and completely uncalled for!!!