We were in middle school when Flight of the Intruder came out. If you’ve seen it or been in the military, there’s this thing called The Phantom Shitter. Well, for the better part of a couple months, my friends and I dropped turds all over town in anyplace that wasn’t a toilet. It got out of hand when someone shit on…

The Fox New Years Eve broadcast has been the equal of this on a loop for 3 hours, and it’s been glorious! I’m hoping it’s a dry run for Trump’s inauguration entertainment.

‘canes fan should’ve stuck with the Road House quote-off and gone with “I thought you’d be bigger”. #missedopportunity

+1 share of frozen concentrated orange juice

I’ve got a question: How the hell do you fit the giant brass balls you have in such a tiny car? 174 mph?!? In a 20 year-old Saab?!?!

Hey! Maybe you guys need a refresher course. It’s all ball bearings these days!

Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician?...He had to work it out with a pencil.

The only reason Louis lost to Rocky Marciano is because Joe Louis was 137 years-old when they fought, making him only slightly older than the Bernard Hopkins I saw the other night.

Here’s a picture of the suspected masturbator:

I’d imagine that track gets a little more slippery once the ladies see who the instructors are:

“Soft names make soft people. I’ll bet you anything that ten times out of ten, Nicky, Vinnie, and Tony would beat the shit out of Todd, Kyle, and Tucker” add Bronston to that list. Sincerely, George Carlin

Holy shit! The Bearcats made the Deadspin feed!!!...and it wasn’t for anything sketchy! Way to go ‘cats!!! #OABAAB

He’s lucky that she didn’t have time to grab a pair of these:

I get that reference!

I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins.

Not in a trailer, but still a damn fine cover used in a damn fine show:

What the hell? It’s a Sunday and Shawshank isn’t showing on any channel? Surely, we are in the end of days.

Hola, amigo. It must’ve been a long time since he rapped at you, but Jim Anchower knows for a fact that the Ford Fiesta is a straight-up pussy magnet, especially if you’re getting the Led out; blasting some Cashmere, yo.

You asked for it, you got it...

Go play intramurals, brother.