TV??!? How about shittiest radio broadcast? Look, Denny (pause 30 seconds) Matthews (pause 30 seconds) may have been something (pause 30 seconds) back in the day, but (pause 30 seconds) he's fucking insufferable. Ryan?

I gave over a decade of my life over to Smallville. Looking back, after the second season, I don't know what the hell I was thinking. To the bitter, freaking end.

"This kid's got some balls."-Mick

This guy's not impressed. Then again, he can't see it.

Great White Hype! The first thing I thought about!

Or just look for this:

Charlie Sheen uses phrenology to measure and interpret the size of Walt's asshole.

That place gave me a $20 gift card, but later asked for it back.

The old man took me out to the pasture in his old CJ, gave me the rundown on how to do it & let me have at it. He also taught me how to change the oil & curse like a sonofabitch once you realize you've stripped the threads on the plug.

I unabashedly love The Lone Ranger as well. I could not help smiling, enjoying the last 45 minutes...the previous 735 minutes, well, editing could've helped.

Oh! "Skittish" about a Perot museum. I thought you were looking for a skit for a Perot museum, in which case, this would be my contribution:

It was the shorter of the 2. Secondly, I wanted to be the first to make the joke (success!), and D, who cares, really? Enjoy your weekend.

Voice activated doors-even better!

"Blah, blah, blah. Can I still stone gay people to death?" Sincerely, Scott Esk

Well, the GOP want a government that has a foundation based on religion, easy access to firearms and a limited government presence in people's lives, so, here ya go!

Imagine being in the theatre opening night for this. Pre-internet/spoilers. Talk about twists. This guy set the freaking bar.

It's got what plants crave.

Great movie. Anecdote: Every time I get a coughing fit, my girlfriend asks me if it's "the black lung". It's one of the reasons I keep her around.

John Candy was the best part...and topless Darryl Hannah, but that's a given.

Pictured below, Dr. Craig McClain